[🧩] The Day I Missed My Ideal Type and Found My Ideal

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When failure experiences of not obtaining what one desperately wants accumulate, a person gradually becomes weak.

• Original: http://blog.naver.com/hyeogikarp/223969019198
• Naver published at: 2025/08/13 12:39 KST
• Original category: Daily Life

Original

When failure experiences of not obtaining what one desperately wants accumulate, a person gradually becomes weak.

As one adapts to that weakness, at some moment one painfully recognizes the absurdity between one’s ideal and reality.

And eventually one becomes unable to endure that absurdity, even denying one’s own desire and reaching the point of trying to distance oneself from the ideal.

But this exact point is the turning point.

Recognizing the absurdity is proof that the ideal has not yet been abandoned.

The last chance to break the vicious cycle of failure is right now.

I have high ideals, and the potential to make them real definitely exists.

And I am someone who can finally reach true happiness only when I develop that potential into real ability.

The roof I am looking up at is not unreachable. It is a height I can climb enough.

Do not forget that this moment, stuck ambiguously in the middle like now, is the unhappiest state.

This time of hesitating, neither fully giving up nor fully challenging.

Let me fully accept this discomfort and recognize the pain.

That moment is exactly the starting point of change.

Today, on the bus, that moment came.

I saw someone externally so perfectly my ideal type that it felt like my breath stopped, but in the end I could not say a single word before she got off.

A guy who says he is going to run a business does not even have that much guts or spirit to challenge…

Even if my hair was greasy, I was wearing workout clothes, and my belly was sticking out, I should have at least tried.

I made a huge regret I cannot erase from my life.

But that does not mean I will keep soaking in defeat anymore.

Because I know that what remains at the end of a life of giving up is only unhappiness, but at the end of a life of challenge there is happiness.

Because I know today’s painful realization will become tomorrow’s power to act.

…

First, let’s lose weight.